When she’s not entertaining the masses, cabaret megastar Sandra loves nothing more than being on her knees worshipping the purple headed trouser snake. And now after years of hard work and services to the man-size tissue industry she’s been rewarded with a prestigious QX Red Nob Award for Best Cock-Sucker. But just how do you become an award wining cock-sucker? Ahead of her big show at the Victoria, Walthamstow, this weekend, Sandra regaled our Jason Reid with saucy tales of past encounters and tips of the oral variety…
Brown Girl in the Ring:
One of the most memorable cock-noshing experiences, for all the wrong reasons, was in Gran Canaria for Jimmy Smith’s (Two Brewers manager) birthday. They all got me paralytic drunk and left me in the dark room. I was having a whale of a time, but I was so plastered that I couldn’t find my way out. I ended up falling asleep in there, only to wake up and find ‘brown stuff’ all over my shirt. I had to walk all the way back to the bungalows looking like I’d just been to a scat night. I was so embarrassed that I didn’t come out of the bungalow for two days [laughs].
Mum’s the Word:
I can’t believe I’m telling you this [loud laughs]. I was in the Finsbury Park toilets one night giving this lush queen a gob job. But I kept getting distracted by someone talking outside. The voices sounded strangely familiar, too. Well anyway, I carried on, as you do, but when I finished and went outside someone tapped me on the shoulder saying, “What ya doing?” I turned around and it was my bloody mum. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me. The worst thing was I had some ‘spillage’ on my face; I had to convince her it was cream that I hadn’t rubbed in, from earlier. How’s that for awkward!
Rolling in the Heath:
When I was but a young girl Hampstead Heath was one of the first places I used to go cock-hunting. They had different sections on the Heath catering to different sexual tastes. For example, the disco bunnies would go up the top to play, and the leather/heavy cruisers down the bottom. Well, one night a friend took me up there and we decided to explore the heavy cruising section. Remember I was young and pure at this time [sniggers]. We had a look around for a bit and eventually this really hot guy caught my eye – very Tom of Finland looking. Looked hung like a donkey too. I couldn’t wait to get my chops around it! But Jason, no word of a lie, the second I unzipped him he had me face down on the floor, giving me a seeing to in a big puddle of mud. I couldn’t move. The man was actually turned on by the MUD. He loved every second. He just left me there, too, the fucker. The things you do for a bit of cock!
SANDRA’S CRUISING SURVIVAL PACK
The veteran queen of cruising lists the must haves, for successful hunting, this season and every season.
- Wet wipes: They are the best thing for wiping up any kind of mess. And we all know what I’m talking about. You really don’t want to be coming home on the number 29 bus with dried spunk hanging from an eyebrow now do you?
- Tissues: Do what I do – shove a load in my bag when I go to KFC. Saves a fortune. I don’t need to explain why you can never have enough tissues. A moment on the lips…
- Poppers: ALWAYS bring two bottles with you because you can guarantee that some bitch will nick yours when there’s a group ting going on.
- Knee pads (or a copy of a generic free gay mag): A seasoned cock-sucker can be on their knees for hours on end. Knee pads will ensure you can enjoy what’s being served up as much as they are (in all weathers too). Scabby/dirty knees are not a good look.
- Wear white: You’d probably think no because it’d draw attention to you, right? But trust me if you wear black and someone chucks their muck on it, you’ll be walking around with their cock snot all down you, because it shows up on black clothes as much as Son Of a Tutu going through customs.
- Clean knickers: One word – seepage. That’s all I’m saying. A spare pair of clean knickers is a must.
- Condoms and lube: Definitely the most important thing. Play hard but always play safe. Hear me now!
• Sandra will be appearing at The Victoria (188 Hoe Street, Walthamstow, E17 4QH) on Saturday 23rd March, £3 before 10pm, £5 after, open till 3am. She also has a weekly Wednesday residence at the Central Station (37 Wharfdale Road, King’s Cross, N1 9SD) at 10.30pm, free entry all night.
